New England CHERUBS Blog

I have created a blog to keep everyone updated on whats going on with CHERUBS locally. I am still working on putting it together but you can check it out at:

http://newenglandcherubs.wordpress.com

Eat Cake

Today I made a baby shower cake for a close friends sister. I really enjoyed making it and everyone seemed to really like it at the shower. As I look around for a job since it is near impossible to be a stay at home mom in todays world... I keep thinking this is what I need to do! I know It's something I'm pretty good at, if I can just get my business going... So I have made it my mission! By the end of this year I plan on having my business plan written out. I need a game plan on what I am going to do with my life. I hate the insecurity of the unknown. This week I am going to call the health department and start figuring out what I need to do to become licensed in Rhode Island. Than will be the search for an industrial kitchen to rent until I can get my own shop going. This is something I really need to do for myself!

Here is the cake I made for the shower today. The design was a bit of each element taken off of different cakes and pulled together by the mother-to-be's sister and mom. It's nice to be able to make thier cake vision come to life :)

Nana

Tonight I found out that my Nana (my great-grandmother) passed away. She hasn't been doing very well lately and having a lot of health problems, and I know she is in a better place where she isn't suffering. Still doesn't make losing her any easier though.

I have many very fond childhood memories of my Nana. She will be greatly missed. I brought Makayla up to meet her a few months ago, not realizing it would be the last time I got to see her.

Memorial service, gift bags, bowl-a-thon

Last sunday we went up to Mass General's memorial service for all the children lost. It really was a beautiful, touching, and very emotional service. It is so difficult to go back to the hospital, but at the same time I find peace in doing so.

While we were there we dropped off our first 2 gift bags! I am very excited to be able to finally have some of these bags put together and ready to go out to give to parents who may need them! If you are wondering what I am talking about check out more info on the Gabriel's Giftbag Project here: http://gabriel-nava.virtual-memorials.com/main.php?action=view&mem_id=8297&page_no=6

Next weekend we have Gabriel's Bowl-A-Thon planned. I really hope that it will be a success. I can't believe Gabe would be 2 years old already. It's crazy to think about how time flies by! I really hope he knows how much I love him and still think about him everyday. I miss my little guardian angel.

Here are a couple pictures of the gift bags we delivered.

Halloween

I think that I am going to start giving updates and posting Ayla's pictures here rather than on her website since I have run out of file space on her website and don't want to have to pay :( So here are a few Halloween pictures from last week.

Update

Well, again I have been meaning to update my blog for awhile now, but time has gotten away from me. I don't even know where to begin.

My birthday was a great one this year. Although I did not enjoy turning 25, just seems closer to 30 than I'd like-lol. Anyway, we drove out to Ohio for a CHERUBS picnic weekend and has a GREAT time. I know it will be the last trip for awhile so we really made the best of it. We stopped in PA to see Kate (another CHERUBS member) who was prego with twins, and delivered them a few days after we left Nate is having me get a tattoo for my birthday of Ayla's feet, but I still have yet to actually get it done. Hopefully in the next couple of weeks.

We are moving!!! Very excited about it. We found a great little duplex in Hope Valley. It's sooo much bigger than the place we have here and its in RI so it will be closer to family. I can't wait to get in there. Of course now comes the tedious chore of packing and cleaning for the next few weeks. This also means I have to find a new job. I'm going to start looking for a waitressing position for awhile until I figure out what my next step career wise will be.

Makayla is almost 8 months old and is doing wonderfully. She is reaching tons of milestones and is getting ready to crawl. I think it will be any day now.... I've started looking for a Halloween costume for her. There are so many cute ones out there it's hard to choose!

Gabe's birthday is fast approaching. It's hard to imagine he would be 2 years old. We are planning a Bowl-A-Thon on November 16th in his memory. I NEED to plan something to keep busy and keep the day positive. I'm really hoping it will be a success. Invitations will go out next week. Everyone is invited and welcome to participate so if you don't receive an invitation but would like to join us, please let me know!

Well, I guess thats enough rambling for now. I will try to update again soon!

Your Baby is 21 Months Old-Ugh!

Yup-he would have been. But he died....so instead he will forever be 2 months old.

Today was just one of those rough days that pop up every now and then. At least they are a lot less frequent. It started with a dream: I had two beautiful kids. One little girl and one little boy. The little boy was about two, was running around and had a mouth full of teeth. I looked at him and realized that I didn't remember him getting that big-or having any teeth. I asked him when he had grown...and he replied that I had missed it all b/c I was paying all my attention to Ayla.

Well, I think that's a pretty easy dream to interpret. I feel that nagging guilt that I am moving on with my life. No big revelation-it just sucks.

Then I got the mail, and right on top was a pampers flyer for pull ups that read: Your baby is 21 months old! Most days I could just toss it aside... but today it felt like a slap in the face. Ugh-yep, just one of those days.